absorbed

417_Absorbed

How much money, nationalities, blah, blah, blah, blah. For almost this whole week, i have done nothing but let my thought energy be absorbed by the TV. Watching movies. I have not studied turkish while waiting on the class to start, i have not been learning the flute, nor doing my yoga, nor walking as

hearts

416_Hearts

After Sevgilim’s performance last night we returned home and had a talk that led to us deciding and me asking her to marry me so that she can get a visa for her travel. We told each other that we were already joined in our hearts and soul, so what more is just a piece

needs

415_Needs

I shall return to the US with nothing but riches, not of the world but of my Father. If i am to be with Sevgilim, I will need to find a job and a place to live for us. If not, i have no such needs. All is much better. My trust in Sevgilim is

feeling

414_Feeling

Today i bought my ticket to Istanbul and tonight i leave. I am going to buy a ticket back to the United States and i am not really looking forward to it. I do not know what my return will be like but i am feeling a bit nervous about it. Last night i dreamt

full moon

413_Full_Moon

(Full Moon 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10) Money is not evil; it is the wanting of it, and the giving of it as an offering of help that is evil. It is an unknown GOD that i have to bring to the people of now days. Who has known of this GOD of the savior-christ? The savior-christ, his disciples,

souls

412_Souls

Two days of Sevgilim and i being put off with each other. This morning was better and she went to school hasta. I did a bit more resting, then did a small review of Turkish, got a bit of sun, and then thought about Love, and wrote Sevgilim a poem. My Father is making this

now

411_Now

Every day is getting better still. I should say everything is getting better for me. Last night Sevgilim went out for an interview and came back at two in the morning, only after i called. My mind, of course raced with acts of indecency and all the thoughts i had of such were of course

players

410_Players

So, i have come with Sevgilim to rehearsal today. After a goodnight after she returned yesterday. We are still not using protection like we should so there is the possibility of having a child. I am at the point where i am more and more less concerned about it every new day. She says she

expenses

409_Expenses

My greatest task is to remove all thought from my mind that she will not be the person i hope and she says, but i must love her fully without building up the mental walls that i left in Akko. Soon, hopefully this cold weather will leave and i will be comfortable enough to start

sights

408_Sights

Sevgilim and I have recovered from our misunderstanding. What was the misunderstanding? nothing but my selfishness. After returning from Israel and the first mention of borrowing money, it put a bad taste in my mouth and I spit it right back out. Love gives, love does not need, it just is. It must be given