The past three days i have been eating more because of my laziness of sitting in the apartment. I hope soon it will warm up and i can spend my days in the park, away from food and watch people and not my appetite. I will try to eat a meal once a day and…
How much money, nationalities, blah, blah, blah, blah. For almost this whole week, i have done nothing but let my thought energy be absorbed by the TV. Watching movies. I have not studied turkish while waiting on the class to start, i have not been learning the flute, nor doing my yoga, nor walking as…
After Sevgilim’s performance last night we returned home and had a talk that led to us deciding and me asking her to marry me so that she can get a visa for her travel. We told each other that we were already joined in our hearts and soul, so what more is just a piece…
I shall return to the US with nothing but riches, not of the world but of my Father. If i am to be with Sevgilim, I will need to find a job and a place to live for us. If not, i have no such needs. All is much better. My trust in Sevgilim is…
Today i bought my ticket to Istanbul and tonight i leave. I am going to buy a ticket back to the United States and i am not really looking forward to it. I do not know what my return will be like but i am feeling a bit nervous about it. Last night i dreamt…
(Full Moon 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10) Money is not evil; it is the wanting of it, and the giving of it as an offering of help that is evil. It is an unknown GOD that i have to bring to the people of now days. Who has known of this GOD of the savior-christ? The savior-christ, his disciples,…
Two days of Sevgilim and i being put off with each other. This morning was better and she went to school hasta. I did a bit more resting, then did a small review of Turkish, got a bit of sun, and then thought about Love, and wrote Sevgilim a poem. My Father is making this…
Every day is getting better still. I should say everything is getting better for me. Last night Sevgilim went out for an interview and came back at two in the morning, only after i called. My mind, of course raced with acts of indecency and all the thoughts i had of such were of course…
So, i have come with Sevgilim to rehearsal today. After a goodnight after she returned yesterday. We are still not using protection like we should so there is the possibility of having a child. I am at the point where i am more and more less concerned about it every new day. She says she…
My greatest task is to remove all thought from my mind that she will not be the person i hope and she says, but i must love her fully without building up the mental walls that i left in Akko. Soon, hopefully this cold weather will leave and i will be comfortable enough to start…