I received one of those one-thirty in the morning calls just the other night. It was, of course, an old love. We talked briefly and decided to make plans to see each other the next day. A secret encounter of the mind, where there is only one playing the game.

I was going to control myself; this should not be too difficult. But she was the aggressor for the most part, until we stopped in the middle of it all. In the end, I made the decision to break my vow of celibacy. Why, is the question to myself, which is the least important thing? What has this opened up is the one of greater questioning.

For many years I loved this girl and with such a love that all others were forsaken. Many prayers were spent asking my lord to bring us together. That was eleven years ago and now that we had just became friends, or so I thought, the deed has been done. Outside of a serious relationship and outside of marriage with no intent, on either of us, to start one. Beside the fact that it is morally wrong to have casual sex, I also have come to a firm personal decision that sex for sex sake is not worth my time. I may think about it every time a beautiful woman goes by, but when it comes down to it, my usual response is to run away like the wind. So now, after so many years how are my feelings?

Until the mentioned night, I still held feelings for her and now there are none at all. I wish her well but it has taught me a very valuable lesson. The lesson is that unless inside of marriage, there should be no more sex. I must mention here however that there may be some instance where once again my judgment goes out the window. For example, there are certain cases into which if she were intelligent, witty, and nice looking, it would be difficult to abstain. As the man, I wish to be as the president put it, when asked if there is a certain type of look, he likes, he replied that he has a very wide appreciation. As of now, no image of a perfect woman comes to mind. Although I pictured her in my mind the other day, as looks go, and wouldn’t you know that I saw her stepping off a sailboat. Whether or not she had the mind or wit is unknown but it would have been nice to find out.