of what use is a mirror to the blind

These entries span decades. As with all which is novel, it is best to follow from the beginning and to review it entirely before passing judgement. For what you picked up to complain about could be what you hold up to praise. Knock and the door will open. Seek and ye shall find. Communications over time.

12-10-96

473_12-10-96

Well, this Comm-client class has lost my ass because of the teaching methods of the instructor. Although I am a tad bit rusty in C. I am reading and doing what I can. I hope things turn around or it will be two long weeks because time went by slowly after lunch. All in all,

12-7-96

472_12-7-96

Things are going well here in L.A. Went out with Lee, whom I bought the interface engine from. Last night we went to Old Town Pasadena which was a really nice place. Chuck and I will have to check out that place again before we return home. I really need to clip my toe nails,

12-03-96

471_12-03-96

Been in California for three days and classes start tomorrow. Chuck and I went to Venice Beach, Beverly Hills, Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, Hard Rock, Malibu, Topeka National Forrest, and Santa Anita to play golf. I shot like hell but had a good time, what do you expect after a lapse of 7 years. The weather

11-26-96

470_11-26-96

Four more days until I leave for L.A. I am looking forward to the trip. Harem3 will be staying in my place while I am gone, taking care of Bachuas and the condo for me. I have done well in keeping away from her this time and L.A. should make it easier. I doubt will

11-16-96

469_11-16-96

I broke it off with Harem3 last night for good. This morning I am already thinking of taking her back into my life. It would not be the right choice though. She has to find out what she needs on her own because I can help her no more and it is affecting me now.

11-06-96

468_11-06-96

I think that the switch in my head, that makes my feelings change, has been tweaked. It usually happens all at once and I hope it is the switch because I am tired of dealing with the situation. The weird thing is that it has happened after seven months again. Seven months maybe the limit

11-05-96

467_11-05-96

Harem3 is pregnant and we are planning on getting an abortion Saturday and then things will…I don’t know how things will be! I am going to tell her how I would like things to go tonight and see what she thinks about all of it. If she insists on the abortion then I will stand

11-03-96

466_11-03-99

I talked again with Harem3, I went by and woke her up yesterday at about 2:00 PM. We went and ate lunch then she called last night when she got off. We went to a friend of hers she works with then to a bar where we had a drink and she told me that

11-02-96

456_11-02-96

I did not last the whole week. I called her Wednesday and we went out and were together that night. I think that she is pregnant but I do not know if it would be mine. I still do not know what to do about her; I still want her more than anything but she

10-27-96

464_10-27-96

It has been a week since Harem3 and I have talked. We saw each other last night and spoke about nothing important. Work has been hell, which is good and school will fill up the gaps this week. I need to lay off the tea and cleanse my body. Nothing has changed to this point