Thirteen moons have passed. The morning star had gone to now return.
Upon reading where my thoughts were in the previous writings, much has changed upon the day of the afore mentioned visitation.
After my seeing Hansel, after his passing, i was unable to sleep. I got out of bed with much thought going through my head. Thinking of what i had seen, experienced and felt, even in an awake state.
I went to work and finished the day and right after jumped on my bike to put these thoughts and energies away. As i rode there was a scene of tense-ness and i rode as hard as i had ever tried and climbed to the top of a ridge. I looked down and something within said let it all go. So i want you to know i did. I peddled as fast as i could and did not touch the brakes. Flying down the ridge, coming to the bottom and rolling up to a hop…when i came to, i was at a stop.
In those days with Hansel, he clearly asked if i had ever broken a bone. My reply was no. His reply was, “well mark my words, if you continue to ride your bike, you will.” Today, i did it with such zeal.
Weeks of pain, months of healing a year of having a crippled arm… thing are, but are not as they were. No more visions i have had. During my time of hurt i laid around and began watching movies and videos and i cared not what of.
I have written of this before but what you put in is what you get out. My thoughts do not directly go to where they did before. They are more selfish, perseveration based and it takes will to keep them in check. But that is the content of what i was viewing and watching and it had its effect on the program.
Not to undo and remove what was added. But what was given to me on that day of my visitation, i do not regret. For Hansel did not come in a spirit of malice but one of happiness. I asked for is essence when he departed and he gave it to me. His being w/o function of body parts, which kept him from doing things that could be done in life, as my arm has, is and did keep me from doing. I have learned much from that experience. I start from a new perspective of knowing where i and all things of the cosmos were going to this point, to where the one main new point is my consciousness had germinated from the seed… i am not an unblemished lamb.