A brief moment after the final year of my 6th year silence, has brought the removal of my final stumbling block. A stumbling block not for me on my path but one that had not been clear enough to remove for others making it difficult for them to follow.
The day started different enough, as they all have been with a new seed beginning to spring. It led to a dialectic with my co-worker M. As the conversation gravitated toward my path and faith(knowledge) and his faith(opinion). As we defined these two terms for ourselves, we ventured upon, of course, children and marriage. I of course regurgitated that which was said that it is best that man should not marry and him pointing out that i am however married and that i am now being a hypocrite for saying this and doing another. As he was looking up the verse, i started remembering why this was told and he finding it, re-affirmed how it was being delivered and stated about divorce and marriage; both being looked at by not the spiritual bonding of two souls but that of man and woman joining out of arrangement and/or desire, carnal desire for one another. And in that context, it is best that man should not marry (marriage being in the worldly legal sense of the word) for when it is of the spiritual then there is not a joining for the above mentioned but for a Godly reason for the development of unbiased, unconditional, self-sacrificing love. My dilemma came from still holding onto worldly words and being at conflict because of my knowledge, that i had specifically stated, that unless my GOD places these events before me, i will not join with a woman. Throughout my journal, women presented themselves and i was given the ability to refrain. Not only did the events i described to my GOD take place but it also became the woman (Sevgilim) who i had dreamt about in the past. So, there had been my point of contention and because of my discourse with M, I have finally unchained myself from the old religion of literal worldly words and am now without the speck in my eye to proceed down the path of that which is once again new. Nothing is in the way now.
It is interesting how i was seeing the writing of all else as spiritual but until now i would not let this one go. Thanks be to GOD and his angels for allowing this to come about. But now that my sight has been cleared, my mind is racing. I see my brothers and sister’s deficiency clearly now. It is not a matter of wanting them to believe as i believe but it is a matter of questioning and taking their belittling of me and not taking it personally as it is their instinctive, programmed nature. But to come again softly as even the constant trickle of water can wear away the hardest stone.
They are engrained in their one book and lean upon paid priests and pastors to guide them. Each and every one saying the other is in error and going to hell. So, either they are all right and they are all going to hell or they are all wrong. I can see the deficiency in their lack of understanding and i must try not to give it to them but to sow the seed that will want them to understand.
As M stated, “I have read enough of the Qur’an to know what it is about” but even today in our talk he told me i was taking things out of context in the Bible and when he looked them up he saw my point. Why do they read one chapter of something and come to the conclusion about the entirety? Study the scriptures they must, not just read them. He believes Immanuel was divine, he believes Immanuel is GOD, yet it was a vote at the Mycenae Council that decided the teaching would be this while the apostles were not in agreement. But since it was to become a state religion of Rome and Cesar had been born of God and from a virgin, it went over better to convert the pagans and make it more acceptable. All the while, he doubts and ignores his own divinity, stating it would be insane to say that he is a GOD or god rather. And so, he remains only an animal. I showed him where CHRIST stated that “Your scriptures” say that you are GOD. But since “Their scriptures” are not contained in the majority of Books missing from the Bible then he dismisses the notion and yet those lines are not missing from “his scriptures”. And in the same breath states to me, that he would willingly destroy innocents out of a fit of childish rage, but still professes to have accepted CHRIST.
His definition of acceptance is the divinity of CHRIST and through the crucifixion and his shedding of blood that he is saved. My definition of acceptance is that this is the very thing you must allow your enemies to do to you and still love them and forgive them. His beliefs and understanding are as the world believes and understands. Mine are of the spiritual. Yet when i inquire whether CHRIST was concerned with a worldly or spiritual kingdom, he replied spiritual. And yet it is still the worldly they want to have.
And so, as it was for Sevgilim’s love for me that watered the seed. That was to remove the stumbling block, it was my grasping and taking hold to the spiritual understanding and meaning which gave the needed light.
And so here we go in preparation, ascending from the worldly with the elect being called.